Who I Be

since my expulsion from the 6th grade my mind state changed 

i rejected the town in which i never played, rather sat and laid/cried and raged. 

remember when steve blew his head off with the twelve guage in the 7th grade.

that was the same year the twin towers blew and everyone thought they knew,

but we never had a clue of what life do. 

by the time i got into highschool i  had a firm rebel attitude.

i only could go to 3 out of 9 periods by the 10th grade, 

afterwards i’d leave get a dime and get high.

i remember being 15 went to this dude for weed, 

he was telling me of shooting D and Glorifying it OD

another dude had some weed he sold me

 didnt let me know it was laced with crack

until i learned after the fact.

now it comes back… 

remembering the ringing ears 

and falling to the floor high with fear.

and before i ever got into drugs,

psychiatrists had me locked up. 

i was imprisioned for who i was 

not necesarily what i had done.

it didnt make sense being so young.

the split second seeing the girl strapped with belts to the bed, 

the white walls hummed death.

O.H.s wanted to give me an IEP like i was handicapped, 

please! otherwise i had to be a loser with a GED

I admit i acted crazy, 

sometimes was so wrong felt i never could be right.

seems like alot of the people in my life wouldnt think twice 

of why i was the way i was in my life.

although i’ve strived 

and made great strides,

i found my beauty letting it shine

my heart aches and i do cry, 

i do pray and i do get high. 

I am beautiful and

i need not lie about who am i.

inequality is equally so an excuse
for you, for me. 

is it your disability
your skin color
you social class
that makes you weak
it does if you so do believe

only if you

adore my scars, adorn my flaws

lay my new wounds with a kiss of salt

suturing them effortlessly,

like you do unwrapping candy

with your tounge and teeth.

only if you

read me like poetry

getting wet from what i speak

grab my belt and tug for me

to make you moan, make you scream

causing to desire when our eyes meet.

only if you

in time unveil all the layers of your dress,

show all of what is you in your spirits nakedness

the calm the cool, the meek the rude; all shameless.

and when we happen to hurt each other it’s painless,

because true love doesn’t have a finger to blame with.

i create kinetically from thoughts thought to be potential

i equate to a higher exponential beyond certified credentials

i relate to minds that deep dive and continually climb, universal.

i speak mines,
cultivate rythms beats and rhymes
born from my life and times

i am me not easily defined
not necessarily all wise
though i am a diety divine
i sense with my third eye
while birds send messages chirped
before they meet the sky

” i’m like all races in one man.” - nasir jones